Tips on how to support an involuntary childless friend this season

That's a crap title but I wanted to get your attention as someone who perhaps has children or has chosen to not have children. I am sure that it's hard knowing what to say or do when you have a friend who is involuntarily childless. I often think of how much I'd hate to be the person having to cope with me when I was at my lowest. This piece was written during World Childless Week but wasn't posted until now as I think it's more timely. I hope it's useful.

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Updated links

We've updated our links page to include groups that have helped us along the way and some suggestions. If you have a blog you think will help others, run a site that's help you and you want to share please do comment below or drop a line.

There are so many ways to help, and it's great to get recommendations. 

Thank you.

 

Inspiration: joining forces

If the battle for IVF funding divides us which it did this week, then finding our friends can unite us. I make no secret about how much I admire the work of those who frequently stand up in much higher profile places that I do, and talk about their journey.  The article in the paper and the video have exposed my story more than I anticipated. The comments were unnerving although not unexpected and nothing I hadn't heard before. It's merely a public extension of what I know many of us experience in daily life. But it still hurts.

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Inspirational wellness: why Walk?

If 30,000 women are seeking IVF treatment annually, and the sector is worth £500million, there should be a voice that provides a space that shows the next steps and unites us. A space that is a safe space for one in ten couples who struggle to conceive to speak out. A resource that could help one in five women who will remain childless through circumstance for life, put across their thoughts? Words which can be shared to explain why ‘just adopt’ is not a simple process, and can be open to all genders? My proposal was to use design to provide a social solution and so this is Walk In Our Shoes.

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Turning a negative comment into a positive

I do my best, as I am sure you all do, to find a balance. One of the inspirations behind Walk In Our Shoes is a best friend who is a mum and has been a constant support, in fact we've had a few posts in our gallery that talk about the relationship between those who are involuntary childless and parents and in the main, I genuinely believe that parents do understand more than we think.

And then there are those who don't.

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#MakingDads eBook

Male infertility is a topic that is not often discussed and quite honestly is completely swept under the rug. Male infertility is often reflective of a man’s poor overall health. Women have many more opportunities to see their doctor annually from smears to breast exams but men really don’t have a reason to go to a doctor each year so they often avoid it @Kristendarcy

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