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Go for it. 

I was asked to write a few tips on writing and I have to say that I have very few.  What I would say is that writing your story can be so beneficial in connecting people. Sharing and talking about difficult situations on blogs on any topic provides support and enlightens others.  It can be powerful to get the words out and helps others to understand.

What can I say?

The gallery is a mix of different real-life stories - by stories I mean factual not fiction. There are so many routes to childlessness not by choice and each is worth speaking out. It may feel like you don't have a story to tell. You do. Even though we've not met (or maybe we have), your words do matter.

50 words or 500? I am not a writer!

It doesn't matter. This isn't a creative writing site so there's no word limit and the only grammar rule I ask is to avoid text-speak. These are honest accounts from the heart so let the words flow and don't be intimidate or inhibited.

Where to start?

Some people are motivated by a moment. Robert was inspired by the Jo Cox Loneliness campaign and Spike by his workplace. Often the accounts can be as a result of a difficult conversation. That moment when we've come home from work or a party and wanted to explode with the frustration and wished we had said something. You can use Walk In Our Shoes to say those words. You may have a found a way to mediate with a friend or want to share a moment when you overcame a problem, how you handled your grief or how you cope at work. Did you have a new start in life? Moved house, career or are you learning to live with the life you have in a different way? 


You might find it easier to speak the words before you write them down, maybe record them on your phone first or scribble them onto a notepad.

Thinking of the person you want to talk to can be helpful as well.  Sometimes planning to show your writing to someone can affect your mindset while writing. For example, if you would secretly like your partner or a close friend to read your deepest thoughts and feelings, you will orient your writing to him or her rather than to yourself. From a health perspective, you may be better off making yourself the audience.

You can swear, rant, share your deep feelings. It can be scary but they tend to be the more compelling stories. 

If you don't have a blog and you want to get the words out, then this is perfect for you.

Write continuously. Don’t worry about grammar, spelling, sentence structure, or language. If you run out of things to say or reach a mental block, take a break. Is this enough? Usually, it is.

When and where should you write? After the initial start, write whenever you want or feel you need to. Also be attentive to too much writing.  Moderation in all things includes transcribing your thoughts and feelings. 

Where you write depends on your circumstances. Try to find a room where you will not be interrupted or bothered by unwanted sounds, sights, or smells.


Psychologist James Pennebaker (1991), author of Opening Up: The Healing Power of Confiding in Others found that anonymity was important. Being certain that your writing is completely anonymous and confidential can be important to many of our contributors. Walk In Our Shoes is set up to be confidential. You can give a pseudonym and your email is optional. This is because I recognise that many people wish to remain private. Any concern that someone else will find your writing, may constrain what you say and how you say it. If you feel worried that someone might find your words should you wish to take your time with your post then you can buy a lock box with key at most stationery shops.

Why a feet selfie?

Well apart from that I love shoes, it's so easy to pop on a pair of shoes (or not) and take a photo with your mobile. It illustrates your story too. Walk In Our Shoes has had bare feet, feet with a tattoo, slippers, socks, heels, trainers. Robert chose his walking boots. 

If you have any questions do get in touch. I'm also on Childless Hour on Twitter every Sunday so you can contact me 'in person' too.