Today is tough. This week is going to be tough. It's back to school week and Buckingham Palace bring news of a third child. I hesitate to post this because if you've not seen already you know now. But I suspect you'll hear very soon as the universe places hope on happy news over the wider world which isn't a good place. But I hope that sharing it here with some advice makes that easier.
As anyone who follows this site often maybe already knows, I don't support parent 'bashing'. I know from good friends that it's hard to bring up children, really tough and those good friends also know that I've been through a lot too. Mutual respect for the challenges we face is far far better than picking holes in each other but only through honest conversations which takes courage.
Sometimes we speak to friends and they don't understand. As we all know, fixing through 'just' do XYZ (adoption, surrogacy and relaxing...you know the ones) are great in sitcoms and soaps but rarely apply in real life. At those times we may have to take a step back.
I'm also of the mindset that nobody has to put themselves through hell by enduring stuff they can take control over. So a few thoughts on stuff I've learned...
- Facebook allows us to set up custom shares for our news. We can use these to look after our friends who maybe upset, coming to terms with loss and a life unexpected. Go to 'Friends' and create a list for those you think are interested.
- It's okay to unfollow.
- It's fine to remove people too. It is your account and your feelings, they are valid.
- There are other events in the world beyond the royal baby. That doesn't mean that we're not happy about it (I'd never want to inflict what I've been through on anyone), it's just difficult to share the happiness about something that we've never had.